a rainfall-laden wednesday afternoon

The sky went to a dreary grey

I was outside, not wanting to go home this early after watching the latest Marvel movie. So I headed for a cup of hot coffee, just a couple kilometers due north. I figured if the unfinished document mom had sent me earlier was given a green light for work, I needed someplace to get it done. After all, I had nothing else to do at home.

Treum. The café’s name shone brightly on a circular neon panel. It was placed so conspicuously that any passers-by can be made aware of its presence. And, the place is located just on a slightly downward curve. Hues of concealed orange neon strips and neatly arrayed potted plants with a tessellating arrangement provided the elevated floor a contrastingly vibrant nuance against its mostly white-and-grey façade. The blaring burrs of the coffee grinder indicate that my coffee is in the making.

Then, trickles of rain began to make their debut.

Sparse, but steady raindrop marks gradually darkened the once dry asphalt road. Umbrellas began to unfold, and concerned eyes looked upwards, wondering whether or not the nimbuses are only short-lived.

In 30 minutes, what seemed to be merely a drizzle now steadily progressed into a heavier shower. The timing could have been much better as the school has just ended around that time. On any other day, the schoolchildren would be gleefully waiting for their parents to pick them up in front of the school’s frontyard in those small, observing eyes. But now, parents on their motorcycles—clothed in their raincoat ponchos—arrived in front of the doors, locating their children’s whereabouts.

One father finally found his little one with his khaki school vest after some time. He hurriedly helped his daughter put on her jacket and guided his hands on the zippers. After having made sure the kid’s fitting was snug, he unfurled a small-sized neon-green-colored poncho and positioned it in a way that the hole part for the head was accessible.

One by one the children started to go home. Some of the parents didn’t arrive on the two-wheeled transportation. Others on foot, carrying umbrellas of all sorts of colors and sizes; some on their cars. One even came in a pickup, just like any pickup truck with the typical open cargo area, though the only noticeable thing was the cleanliness of it. It was spotlessly clean. Not a single dirt stained the backside, or any part of it for that matter. The owner was a slender-built dad who parents two similarly-aged kids. They then sat on the two-seated cabin and drove off.

The thing about being seated on the veranda (I do not know what the name of it, so pardon me) is that you can just look outside and observe all the people around you. The peddlers selling candies or sweets or any snacks that children are inherently programmed to like; the woman who weren’t dressed for the weather taking shelter under one of the leafy trees; the four-membered family riding one motorcycle who seemed to mind practicality more than convenience.

As I’m writing now, it’s not clear whether the rain will subside anytime soon. It’s the kind of circumstance where you need headlamp light in order to see whether or not it still rains. My cappuccino is still two-third empty, and if the day gets dark, I’ll just brave the full magnitude of the afternoon downpour.

Day 7: favorite movie

Before Sunrise.

This is the one movie that blatantly oppose the usual go-to phrase said by many (or most) parents towards their children.

Never talk to stranger

This movie took it up a notch and went more than just talking to stranger; not only do they talk, but also roam around a completely unfamiliar city, with a stranger whom the protagonist met on a train ride—having only talked for a moment in time that was proceeded with an abrupt and insane-sounding proposition.

The idea sounded something along the line of:

… in twenty years from now, you will be stuck with a husband that left you dreading, and wondering on the possibility that life would take a turn for the better had you took the chance of going out with a stranger. However, if this doesn’t work out, then all is fine, then.

The two main characters (mainly the took the leap of faith and explored the city of Vienna, forged a chemistry so strong and so unreal it transcends common sense of this era.

I would really like to spill the rest of the movie, but I feel like I have to leave out the remaining plot for you to find out (if not already) :p

Day 6: Single and Happy

I’ve been single for almost 6 years (yes, i know that’s a very long time)

However, I had been in non-committal relationships (a fancy term for “hts”)—which ended up either me being ghosted (ha ha) or them getting a relationship with someone else. Yes, it sounds really miserable; I have gotten used to it by the 3rd or 4th time.

Back in my uni days, I would fill up my time with hanging out with my friends or busying myself by participating in some events so that romance would be out of the equation. I remember joining an event as an LO despite having no experience at all—immediately after finding out that my crush went back to her ex. HAHA.

Anyhow, that is how usually the case goes back when I was still studying . Now that I have, I constantly ponder the activities in which I am able to occupy myself. I’ve been trying to read books, watch movies, hell I even had a cat pet right now (not because I am trying to refrain myself from getting back into a relationship; it’s a long story but we somehow had a kitty as a pet during the pandemic)

To say that I am happy is not completely true. I am single, yes. But I am not sure whether or not I am happy.

Revised, I am currently not happy. I haven’t been in the best state of mind lately as things have gone awry and not been in my favor. But that’s okay, because it gives me time to reflect on what I am currently feeling, to contemplate on how I might deal with the current situation, and to get to know myself better should this circumstance repeats.

I realize I should just focus on being happy. “How” would be the usual word that follows the premise. But by pursuing meaningful activities in life, through which happiness is the repercussion, seems like a good start.

I hope by the time I look back to this one post, I would be much wiser and realize that life has its phases, its ups and downs, and they are just small bumps that will ultimately hone my ability to handle many more of what life has to offer.

Cheers.

Day 5: Your parents

I love my parent. Yes, without “s”.

My parents divorced when I was too little to understand. What I can say was that it was a bitter one. My mom endured so much; I love my mom so much. She has to be the strongest woman I’ve ever known throughout my life.

As for my dad (I kinda hate calling him this, I’ll just refer him as “my father”), he was a kind and fun person back then. My most memorable time with him was when he often takes me out cycling in the evening around where he’d buy me soft drink on the way back home. Before arriving, he’d told me not to snitch to my mom that I drink the carbonated beverage. But I sorta did 😦

I now kinda feel saddened a bit on the fact that—over the span of my life with him— was the only moment that struck deep inside me. I cannot recall during all those years what various father-son activities we did.

Despite this, I have been growing up without the typical father figure in my life. My maternal grandfather, the only notable male figure in the household, has been taking care of us all as well as my grandmother. They have kind of become my second parents!

Anyway, I don’t really discuss much about my family because unnecessary sympathy is the last thing I need. Yes, my family isn’t the “perfect” “stereotypical” “dream scenario” family; But I will gladly take it as it is, imperfect, yet perfect in its own way.

Day 4: places you want to visit

In this situation? Any place would do just fine.

I am writing this as the Covid-19 pandemic is still ongoing—and not showing any prospect of good news any time soon.

The last time I went somewhere other than my home town and areas within 40 km from it was in January when I, my mom, and some of her friends went to Singapore for a short getaway. That was when the world was doing sort of okay and not in complete chaos. People were going here and there without having to worry any life-threatening virus looming over them for the next 14 days. Masks were for those working in the hospital or with regular coughs or were unable to put on their makeup who just wanted to buy something from a nearby grocery store.

God, I miss those times.

Now, it seems like going outside for a quick meal would require extensive premeditation and constant shifts between that, and looking up foods in the GoJek app. In fortunate times, I can make up my mind and not ending up being indecisive and doing neither.

However, back to the topic, having completed one of my bucket list back in December which was riding from Jogjakarta—the city in which I spend my 4 years studying uni—to Malang—my home town, I feel like doing another one that is a tad more challenging and intrepid to some extent: riding from one end of Java Island to the other end.

Imagine, visiting each city and town to get a little taste of what it has to offer. Taking photos every stop and how cool would the vlog look like! Although, I can already feel my butt sore to the core from just imagining the duration it would take.

One thing for sure, it would surely not be a one-day-trip like the previous one. I would have plenty of time to spare.

*currently writing it in my mental bucket list

Update 08 May

Hi, D here again.

 

I am doing something new, something to get myself out of the dullness and lethargy I’ve been having during the past few months.

So, since the month Ramadan is ongoing, and I will be regularly fasting for a whole month and I was being sluggish and a complete sloth (that’s before fasting, imagine if I were!), I decided to challenge myself into being a more committed, driven, and consistent human being that I genuinely wish to be.

What the challenge is, you ask?

 

30 days. 300 kilometers (of run). 

 

300 kilometers may sound A LOT. 

But if you think about it, it’s 10 kilometers per day, and I have ran a little less than that back then.

Hopefully, even though I will be running at the peak of starvation and thirst, it might just help me more to achieve the very purposes that underlie this challenge.

And weirdly enough, the course that I will be running on, is a place which people sell snacks and refreshments for breaking people’s fast. Who knows? It might motivate a people or two to do the same thing. Haha.

 

Cheers.

 

p.s. I will be making daily vlogs during my run.

p.p.s. I might make a Youtube video of them.